Inspired

Finally a keynote address to get inspired by -- General Rick Hillier, what a leader! It wasn't so much his message about leadership that moved me, it was the enthusiasm for his military career and the people that touched his life that really inspired me. Here is a man that actually reminds me a lot of my own old man by the way he tells a story, curses and makes people belly laugh. And in spite of his fame and power, he comes across as an ordinary Canadian -- sincere and down to earth. Here's some of the advice I heard: People come first -- not processes, projects or technology. Keep your people close to you -- INFORM them of your plans and recognize their talent. Keep yourself in check -- never let success go to your head. Be true to yourself -- falsity is easily detected. Use humour!

I can't remember all of the other gems, but I do remember feeling quite impressed by not only the General's career, but by his confidence and joie de vivre. Pure awesome.

Holding my breath

Another tid bit from my Cheryl Richardson book -- nothing lasts so don't fear the future. Know that life will get worse -- you will get sick, lose your job, have your heart broken, lose a loved one. It's how you are able to handle these pitfalls that's most important. Enjoy the good times, but take time everyday to build your spiritual health so that when you fall, you won't come completely undone. This makes a lot of sense to me. I used to think "I want to really enjoy myself in this moment, but I'm afraid that it will end." Well, it's supposed to end. That's the duality of life. Gotta love those reality cheques. K, I'm buying that, so how do I go about becoming spiritually healthy? This book talks about surrendering to a Divine power. Hmmmm, sounds too much like religion which I have a complete disdain for lately. I like the idea of strengthening my core though. In fact I really admire people who are strong inside. They are not afraid of emotions and allow themselves to feel but are not ruled by their emotions.

Let it go

While reading a Cheryl Richardson book that was recommended to me by my intuitive, I was reminded of something so key to inner peace that I can't believe that I've let it slip away. Stop trying to control life. Just let it be. When I think about what makes me angry, it comes down to life not cooperating with my plans. I can't make him love me, I can't make my boss respect me, I can't even make my kids listen to me. So just let it go. That feels really good actually. I don't want to make life my enemy. And who says what I want is what should be any way? Getting all worked up about someone else's behaviour does not in fact change their behaviour. All I can change is my attitude. Just stop wanting anything and then you will never be disappointed with what you get. It is what it is. Could it be better? Perhaps? It could also be a whole lot worse. The everyday blehs are 99% of life. This is it Baby. I've wasted too much of my life hoping and dreaming about those magical moments that will a) never be b) never live up to my expectations or c) disappear as quickly as they come. What a self-help rant I'm having here. Today, as the glorious sun came out of hiding and warmed my air-conditioned body, I realized that I need to accept my life and stop fighting it. And that has made all the difference.

Data Visualization

Why say in words what you can express in a picture? I'm not talking about traditional graphs to express numbers per se, but pictures that express a variety of ideas like this one that I saw in an enterprise architecture presentation today. I love this! In fact I would love to be able to do more of it myself. My writing has certainly improved, but I dislike being verbose. Plus ppl don't read anymore. Maybe I could create my own 'killer presentations' service. Will keep it tucked under my hat for now and see where it leads.

Pillow Talk

Crazy blogging night tonight. Just thinking about a conversation I had with a colleague. He was telling me about his first love and how incredible their relationship was - being inseparably close, comfortable in every way, staring at each other in bed for hours ..... ahhhhhhhhh. I think I was starting to drool at that point. And then my colleague reminded me that that was life in our twenties. Everyone has one of those intense love affairs that they will never forget. But sadly it does not last. You never marry the person you are that crazy about and perhaps that's a good thing. I'm learning that the fantasy is way better than the reality. My colleague doesn't have to think hard to remember how incredibly in love he once felt. The tingle, expectation, desire ... these live in my memories and my fantasies. They are not tainted by reality either. Staring at each other for hours ......

The fire under my ass

So today I finally did it -- I created a master work plan for all the work I've been procrastinating about for months. Granted, I was kicking and yelling all the way, but if felt good to finally have 'a plan'. No more pissin' in the wind. We now have a plan to measure our lack of progress against. Even with the generous estimates I basically pulled out of my ass, we will start being behind three weeks from now. I can hardly wait to be shamed by my very own plan (thank you for the cynicism (you know who you are)).

Interesting how this also relates to my conversation about nagging. I was not motivated to do this -- it took my manager and her colleague coming down hard on me to force me into action and sadly the embarrassment worked. But I love planning. I'm good at it. However, I think that I procrastinated so long because I know we have no focus on our team. When the plans are long range, the priorities change daily, and there's no mgmt support, there's just no point planning anything. Better to just arrive at the office and see what lands on your desk. Seek satisfaction in putting out little fires, conjuring up some recycled IM advice and being your client's hero. Throw in a fabulous lunch, a few power breaks and call it a day. That's what I expect out of my career. And what's wrong with that?

I guess now that the plan is done, I can be a little more organized about my work. Next time I get asked to do something last minute that is beyond my responsibilities, I can just hold up the plan and say "sorry, we need to stay on target here". Gawd, I'm a bitch (again, I know who to thank for encouraging me to let it shine). xx

More on Nagging

It's my responsibility as a parent to nag my kids when it comes to teaching them to be respectful to others and to work hard. I was reminded of this today -- instill good work habits early on and a prosperous future is pretty much guaranteed. And yet it seems so unnatural to keep motivating my kids to do their school work, practice their piano and read. I've said it a million times before -- I hate to hear myself nag. Ideally I want them to be motivated by the task. I want my son to run to the piano and be so engrossed in his book that he can't put it down. Sure I don't mind reminding them of their obligations -- they are kids after all. But the coercion, threats, bribes, yelling. These are things I want to avoid.

I think I take for granted how hard my parents worked to get me where I am. I was one of those kids who as my mothers often says "had to be pushed". I day-dreamed a lot. I took forever to do anything. I just didn't see the point to school. My mother had to watch me do my homework everyday or it wouldn't get done. I was paid for every A I brought home and I was terrified of getting anything less than a B. I don't want this for my kids. You cannot sustain motivation by offering external rewards. But then again, somehow it worked. I developed good study habits and a strong work ethic. My mom stopped nagging me about school and found other things to get on my case about. :-)

Again, it's about balance. I owe my kids my best. The future is so much brighter if you are educated. Time to let my inner nag shine. I'll keep it under wraps for my partner, but I'll give my kids all that I've got. xx