Monday, January 10, 2011

You're Just Saying That!

I often find myself recoiling when my partner pays me a compliment. I accuse him just wanting me for sex. I hate feeling objectified and his horniness really cramps my desire for him. Of course he's been accused of this so many times now that it's no wonder he doesn't pursue me anymore.

I'm starting to have empathy for his position. "All you want is sex". Yes! He wants sex. Guess what, he's a virile male. And he happens to want sex with ME, the love of his life no doubt. So what's the big deal? Why am I punishing him for wanting what's natural?

I forget what sex means to him. It allows him to feel the LOVE. As archaic as this sounds, it's true. He has a hard time expressing his feelings, being tender, giving me the affection I crave. He can't tap into any of this unless he's feeling the LOVE. And that begins and ends with sex. I notice it almost immediately -- after a roll in the hay, he gives more of himself, has more patience with the kids, is more agreeable. He's just easier to live with. And so am I! It's the only way to release the stresses of the day. I admit it, I'm also an Alpha Male and I need sex as badly as my partner. So I'm going to stop making him feel dirty for wanting it. We are married after all. Guilt-free sex is part of the reason we did this. Let's just enjoy it. More.

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