Saturday, November 27, 2010

Delayed gratification

I can't even remember what this feels like. I've become so spoiled with my "see it-want it-buy it" attitude. The last two weeks of Christmas spending is starting to make me feel nauseous. Where is the restraint? Do we even have enough money in our bank account to cover this? I haven't a clue and even if I did, it probably wouldn't stop me because this is Christmas after all and you don't get a second chance to get it right.... or do you?

I don't like feeling out of control. Remember the good 'ol days of saving up for something, and looking forward to getting it? By the time it was yours, it actually meant something. Or better yet, you realized that you really didn't want it and were strong enough to walk away. Take dessert -- it fails to satisfy. Too much of a good thing and in fact now my sugar addiction is starting to piss me off because I have not lost the pre-holiday weight I promised myself I would. I think it's worse this year because we seem to have no time to shop so everything seems like an impulse buy. We're buying gifts more out of obligation and guilt -- especially for our extended family, who really don't need anything they can't buy for themselves.

So what do I do when I feel this helpless? I desperately grab hold of spending I can control, like food. I have to pinch pennies somewhere to compensate. Of course I'm never sensible about it -- I just go ape shit on my family. Like this morning, I almost diluted the milk in my cereal with water. KD, hot dogs, freezer burnt leftovers -- these are next week's meals. Will this work to balance the buyer's remorse that I already feel? *Sigh* This is a first for me -- I CAN'T WAIT for January to get here. Deprivation, I'm yours.


  1. KD?! Those poor kids :(

    I totally feel what you're saying here, D. Ever since John and I moved in together we've been somewhat flush, and it kinda sucks in a way to just get what you want when you want. I feel we're passing that on to H too, so I need to start keeping it in check. So often we'll be at Loblaws (which frickin' has a toy section now), and if he happens to show interest in something under 15$, I just agree to it. What the hell. I gotta stop that and teach him something about money and earning, etc.

    For Christmas, thank god we only have 1 kid and John's side of the family doesn't do gifts anymore (other than the kids). I only have to worry about H and my parents. As an only child, I feel I can't NOT give them gifts... who else will do it?!

  2. Good to hear that you do that too -- I am forever picking up little toys for the kids throughout the year. B-days and Christmas used to be the only times we received pressies ... spoiling them again. Thankfully the kids aren't greedy -- their lists are reasonable. It's us who go overboard. I'm still grappling with how few gifts they'll be under the tree, but it's better that we slow it down now before things get really expensive with electronic games and designer clothes!