Sunday, August 28, 2011


I really hate it when couples bicker in public. For example, he's telling a story, she interrupts because he's got some insignificant detail wrong -- "it wasn't Tuesday, it was Wednesday". He disagrees, she belabours the point. The listeners are sitting there feeling uncomfortable and embarrassed. More wine anyone? I think I hear my daughter calling me from the bathroom to wipe her bum. I joke, but this kind of bickering is just another way that resentment builds in a relationship. It's as if we need to put our partners in their place by correcting them. Being stopped short in the midst of a story really takes the wind out of your sails too. When I'm listening to someone else, I expect that they will embellish a little to keep my interest. When the spouse interrupts, I'm as put off as the story-teller.

I think that I'm particularly sensitive because I used to do it all the time myself. But once I realized it and pointed it out to my partner, we now both made a conscience decision to resist correcting one another in public. Now, if we could do this in private too, life would be a lot more peaceful. I guess that's what I really want, more than affection even -- PEACE in my relationships. My folks fought all the time and I know that I'm a fighter too. Not anymore. I'm really glad that with this habit at least, I'm at the point that I can see it in others and be grateful that it's behind me.

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