Monday, August 22, 2011

I like that she is tall

My son asked me to name something about my partner that I liked, so I rhymed off a dozen or so things that immediately came to mind. He seemed to be having fun asking me to keep naming things and I was touched by this sweet family moment -- that is until he asked my partner the same question. Not one for expressing feelings, my partner stumbled awkwardly in front of us, wracking his brain for anything. "I like that she is tall" was all he could come up with, followed by "I like that she got rid of her cat when I moved in." And finally "I like that she won't be mad at me later because I can't think of anything." Sorry. I got mad. I got hurt. I got mad some more. His pathetic lame ass attempt was inexcusable. But then, after I tore a strip off of him and looked at his sad face, I remember that it truly is a handi-cap. He cannot express love. He doesn't know how. I knew it before we got married and I chose to live without it. I chose this. I can't forget that. I also have to remember that it's a small sacrifice considering everything else that we have going -- three little souls that fill my heart with love everyday. I like that she is tall -- it actually makes me laugh it's so pathetic. Thank goodness all men are not this clueless, although I think my dear partner is not alone here. I'll love myself more and keep giving what I want until the law of attraction kicks in. Who knows what could happen. xx

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