Tuesday, September 6, 2011

I can't say enough good things about your partner

Come again? Twice in one week someone has told me about how great a soccer coach my partner is. His passion for the game is genuine and he's amazing with kids so it shouldn't be a surprise to hear other people singing his praises. But they're not just talking about his coaching, they think he's an AMAZING GUY. WTF?
I'm grateful for the perspective -- appreciate what you have D and what you have is pretty darn good. But then I'm also resentful that I get the shitty end of the stick. I often quietly watch my partner in public -- he's so engaging with others and his smile and laughter is so infectious. I want to be with THAT guy! -- not the miserable, cold and demanding jack ass that is my partner. The same is true for me. I am sweet as pie with others, even more so since my niceness manifesto. And I am a complete bitch at home -- miserable, cold and demanding. *Sigh*. Is this what marriage has done? We used to bring out each other's best. Our private time together was bliss. Now we are one in the same -- UNHAPPY. I'm clearly getting what I'm giving. But I'm too tapped out and stubborn to try and turn this around.
For now, I'll take this as a sign from the universe to cut him some slack, let go of resentment and just open my eyes to see the good person in front of me. Thank you universe.

2 comments:

  1. We're in the same boat, and I hate to say it, but it's the kid(s) that did it. Not H himself ('cause he's an easy great kid), but between juggling work, life, and taking care of H, there's little down time. Both parties feel they're pulling their weight while both parties feel the other isn't. It's such a struggle. I wish I had an answer for you, but we're stuck in the same rut now too.

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  2. I feel duped. I knew that raising kids would be tough, but I had no idea of the havoc it would wreak on my marriage. In fact we even had #3 because a small part of me felt it would strengthen the family bond. It must be even harder for you to get time to yourself with working together. By Sat. night I've had my fill of time together and want to trottle him. Here's hoping we all survive the tough years and regain some of the good that brought us together in the first place? xo

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