Monday, October 11, 2010
I've often fantasized about getting my breasts done but never really thought I'd go through with it until recently. I half-jokingly suggested it to my partner the other night and he was all over it. Within five minutes he was on the net doing 'research'. Saline vs silicone, what are the advantages of each? what feels and looks more natural? what about the cost? Ugh. I'm really torn about this. On the one hand I miss my breasts. Five and a half years (and still counting) of breast feeding and losing 35 lbs have really wreaked havoc on my poor little breasts. I love my girls, but I can't accept them as they are. I want to restore them to their former glory. I'm not talking about blowing them up to mammoth porn-sized knockers, just respectable C-cups.
The other part of me feels like a complete fraud for wanting this. Surely the money can be put to a nobler cause! How will it feel not being 100% me? Will I really like my body more with alien implants floating on my chest? What will I tell my daughter (or anyone else for that matter)?
Lastly, there's my partner. He's a little too enthusiastic about it. I appreciate his support, but what about loving me as I am? Hell, he would've made the appointment for me last night, had I suggested it. Ugh -- I can just picture his greedy paws all over my fake breasts. The boy is already insatiable. The fake breasts will turn him into a crazed pervert. And how will I look when I'm 80 years old with stacked tits?
I don't know. The fantasy is nice... But I've got some pretty kick ass padded bras, so why do I really want to do this? My partner will be devastated if I tell him that I've had a change of heart. Although I'll probably change my mind a hundred times and he'll just have to live with whatever I decide. Right now, I'm still the 'milk lady', so the boob-job will have to wait. xx